Saying ‘yes’ to a pandemic wedding

Read in Indonesian

“People will marry no matter the circumstances,” Wahyu Pahlawati, General Manager of Royal Kuningan Hotel Jakarta, told The Finery Report. “Even if only 30 people* can attend the wedding, they will still go ahead when they have made the decision,” she continued.

Indeed, that seems to be the case for many Indonesians. The COVID-19 pandemic has turned the wedding industry upside down. As we are facing a novel enemy, the rules regarding weddings and gatherings are evolving all the time, forcing wedding parties and vendors to adapt to the constant changes.

Even with the restrictions, it does not mean that Indonesians are refraining from getting married. While there have been reports of lower number of newly registered marriages in certain areas, such as North Sumatra and the Special Region of Jakarta, in other areas, such as Aceh, the rates of new marriages experience no change in comparison to before the pandemic. In fact, in some areas of the country the numbers have actually increased.

Generally, the rules in Indonesia allow for ten attendees during the akad nikah or holy matrimony procession at home or at the Religious Affairs Office, or up to 20% of the venue capacity – and no more than 30 people – if held elsewhere. For wedding receptions, the rule limits attendees to no more than 50% of the venue capacity to ensure that there is sufficient room for proper physical distancing.

The aforementioned rules are much more relaxed than the rules in some other countries, such as Singapore. Tamma (30), an Indonesian living in Singapore, and his bride Felicia decided to have an intimate wedding in Singapore this past August, with both sets of parents attending virtually from overseas.

The gathering only allowed 20 people in the room including the bride and groom. Although, in recent weeks Singapore has updated the regulations to allow gatherings of up to 50 people, with notable restrictions. “For gatherings of up to 50 people, the organisers need to make sure that guests will not mingle with each other. So usually people have banquet tables, and only people at the same tables can socialise with each other,” Tamma explained.

For couples who decide to go ahead with their weddings despite the pandemic, there are pros and cons to weigh. Firstly, the current situation is actually perfect for those who long for an intimate wedding. A pandemic wedding is relatively more affordable than a typical Indonesian wedding.

Moreover, pandemic weddings with virtual livestreams can actually reach more people. People who otherwise would not be able to attend can witness the ceremony in real time, while the couples can virtually invite people with ease without having to think about extra costs.

On the flip side, this requires a lot of compromise for those who have dreams of a fairytale or a destination wedding. Not physically having everybody at the wedding is also a sensitive point couples need to consider. And of course, there is the responsibility to protect the guests and wedding parties from the dangers of the ongoing pandemic as much as possible.

The changes in regulations, attitudes, as well as the development of the pandemic itself have impacted wedding and wedding-related vendors in a major way. Just because people still get married, it does not mean that the demand for wedding related services remained as before.

Most weddings are downsized, and items deemed non-essential can often be eliminated. Depending on the couple, that could mean wedding entertainment, decor, or others.

Royal Kuningan Hotel, which has a ballroom that can accommodate up to 1,800 people, has gotten used to catering for wedding parties of only 30–100 people in the past few months. “We just follow the government regulations, if they say we can cater up to 50% of the venue capacity, then that is what we offer. We had no weddings from April to July, and most of them have been moved to September–December,” Wahyu explained.

Meanwhile, for make-up artist Priscilla Myrna, the difference is vast. Usually, during wedding seasons, from September to December, she would have 15-20 wedding clients per month. For this year’s wedding season, she averages 5-7 wedding clients per month.

Moreover, she has also had to make adjustments in her practices. “Clients these days require rapid or serology testing – or sometimes even swab test – the day before the event. There was a client who had me tested on the day of the wedding. I cannot imagine if the test turns out positive though, who is going to do the make up?” Priscilla shared.

She has made a habit of using hand sanitiser and sanitising her make-up equipment long before the pandemic, but these days she also uses disposable lip brushes and spoolies because they come in contact with eyes and lips.

Govinda Rumi, a Bali-based photographer, shared that under normal circumstances there are two types of wedding clienteles in Bali: destination wedding and local wedding clients. “For me personally, I have done zero destination wedding photography in the past six months. Before, on average we could do about 4-8 destination wedding projects per month,” Govinda added. Thankfully, Govinda and his photographer friends are still able to do wedding photography for local clients, though not as frequently as before.

Interestingly, pandemic weddings have also created new demands and opportunities. Live streaming services for weddings, for example, have significantly risen in demand. For other types of vendors, adjustments are needed in order to survive.

Catering services may not provide buffet services for hundreds of guests anymore, but they may offer luxury meal hampers that couples can send to their loved ones who are unable to attend. Providing bento style or portioned food selections are also becoming more popular as this option minimises utensil sharing among guests. Some businesses, such as Metland Hotel Cirebon, decide to invent new packages; the Cirebon hotel now offers a drive-thru wedding package, which includes cashless gifting services.

Most of the wedding service providers we interviewed do not provide refunds of the down payments, but allow for adjustments in the services provided. For instance, Govinda allows clients to convert the down payment to a voucher that can be used as a gift for others. Priscilla allows her clients to make date changes within six months without penalty.

Carol (29), a client of Priscilla’s, has benefitted from such lenience. She already had to postpone her wedding once and move it to 18 September 2020. Unfortunately, with the new large scale social restrictions in Jakarta, her wedding would not be able to be held as planned. Thus, she decided to move her wedding date again to 13 September 2020 three days before the event.

One thing is for sure, the restrictions brought by the COVID-19 pandemic pose no hindrance for couples to make their weddings memorable. In fact, this may be the beginning of a major cultural shift when it comes to Indonesian weddings.

Priscilla believes that weddings will never be the same again, even after the pandemic ends: “We have been in this situation for six months, and it has become a lifestyle to be more careful; I don’t think we’ll ever be as carefree as before.” She sees the trend to go into the direction of more intimate events, with lesser people opting for a closed reception in a ballroom with thousands of guests.

Govinda echoed that perspective, “I know that in Jakarta there is a trend called ‘Intimate Wedding Package.’ But in Bali, we have always done that. I am used to handling small wedding parties of 20 or 30 people. Now this type of wedding is becoming popular in Jakarta too due to the pandemic.”

At the end of the day, love is not cancelled and never will be. Even in the face of perhaps the biggest global challenge of the past century, people will always find ways to officiate love. For players within the industry, flexibility and the ability to seek new opportunities will be the keys to their survival.

*before large-scale social distancing (PSBB)